The iPaper's Agony Uncle
Since the start of 2024, Kenny has been showing up as an Agony Uncle with the iPaper.
He's responded to write-ins about feeling empty and disconnected, marriage difficulties, body dysmorphia, sexual performance and all the other secrets that men can fear speaking out.
I’m a 37-year-old man and I’ve been on Hinge for three years – I’m being left behind
"Are you genuinely interested in your dates, finding out about them – or more concerned to upsell your own strengths?"
2 December 2024
I’m worried spending Christmas with my ex and her new family will break me
"You might no longer be part of a standard two parent nuclear family, but you are an important member of a blended family"
25 November 2024
I'm attracted to my wife's best friend - I think she feels the same
"If you feel you’re hiding something and that disconnects you from your partner, then that is a loss."
18 November 2024
I’ve been with my girlfriend for 10 years – sometimes I feel like I’ve settled
"This sounds awful but I’ve started to wonder if I could do better. I even downloaded Hinge, but deleted it straight after out of guilt"
11 November 2024
My partner is 40 and desperate for a baby but I am ambivalent
"My partner is fearful that I may end up leaving her for someone younger when I ‘change my mind about children’ and that she will regret it forever"
4 November 2024
My partner won’t stop interrupting me and it’s driving me crazy
"I feel like my partner isn’t listening because she never lets me finish"
28 October 2024
My daughter-in-law is a money-grabber and my son is a wimp
"Encouraging caring communication between your son and daughter-in-law is key"
21 October 2024
I’m 55, my kids have flown the nest, my wife is busy working, and I feel lost
"Whatever the dynamic within your relationship, this is also a time to focus on yourself"
14 October 2024
I want to be in touch with my daughter and I want to protect her: what do I do?
"Trust your daughter, in time, to recognise that she doesn’t feel good about herself when she’s around her boyfriend"
7 October 2024
My wife is going sober and asked me to do the same - I don't want to
"While your wife is focused on your drinking, I wonder whether at some level her invitation to you is: 'Be with me on this new adventure' "
30 September 2024
My needy girlfriend wants more affection than I can give: what do I do?
"It might be that your girlfriend’s are words of affirmation and physical touch, while yours might be acts of service and quality time"
23 September 2024
My wife and I stopped having sex 15 years ago - but it’s the affection I miss
"We haven’t had sex during that time, but it’s touch – hugging and choosing to be close – that I miss the most. I miss her"
16 September 2024
My wife controls all our money - so I cheat on her to regain my freedom
"I feel a possibility that you might actually want to be with her but that she’s too overbearing"
9 September 2024
I'm in £60,000 of debt - but I'm too scared to tell my wife
"The home truth that needs to be accepted is that your family is not currently financially stable"
2 September 2024
I think my girlfriend is cheating, so I check her phone in secret
"Checking your girlfriend’s phone is illegal and is considered stalking checking your girlfriend’s phone"
26 August 2024
I respect women so why can't I stop staring at them in the street?
The anonymous reader wants to know about his looking at younger women – and worrying about his wife finding out
19 August 2024
I prefer my son to my daughter – and I feel wretched about it
"Boarding schools are not always the best options for a child or a family"
12 August 2024
I want to give my son £10k – but not my daughter, she’ll fritter it away
"Some very important skills that parents often don’t pass on to their children are the basic tools of budgeting and saving"
5 August 2024
I watched my partner give birth – and now I don’t want to have sex with her
"What do you do after the trauma of childbirth if it changes your relationship?"
29 July 2024
I want to leave my children different amounts in my will – my daughter needs it more
"Is it fair to leave your children different amounts depending on their stage in life?"
22 July 2024
I grew up more wealthy than my kids will – and I feel terrible for it
"The most important question for you to answer is where does your guilt stem from"
15 July 2024
My wife prioritises her friends and work over me – I’ve become an afterthought
"Focus on being there for yourself and this will help you become available to love"
8 July 2024
Why can’t I stop cheating on my beautiful wife?
"Seeking out help from a professional may be the way forward..."
1 July 2024
I want to send our son away to school but my wife refuses – we can’t compromise
"Boarding schools are not always the best options for a child or a family"
24 June 2024
I resent my wife now we have a child – I wish we could go back 10 years
"The early years of parenting can be a particularly tense time couples."
17 June 2024
I’m a saver and my wife’s a spender – she needs to grow up
"Money is never really about money. It is about “stuff” that lies much deeper."
10 June 2024
My wife is stricter than me and we don’t agree on how to parent our kids
"Children who aren’t brought up with boundaries can feel less safe and display anger."
3 June 2024
My wife doesn’t want to work – even though our kids are at school
"Surveys have shown that the work of a stay-at-home parent would be worth more than £30,000 as a salary."
27 May 2024
I want a second child but my wife doesn’t and it’s breaking us
"Before children, we talked about having a big family, an idea we both loved."
20 May 2024
I’m not sure if my partner is ‘the one’
"Life involves bliss, grief and every emotion in between"
13 May 2024
My wife prioritises our kids over everything – I’m thinking of leaving her
"If you give energy to the way you want things to be, and share this with your wife, then you’ve got every chance of a successful relationship."
6 May 2024
I’m a 70-year-old widower – I want to meet someone new but don’t know how
"I’m looking for love – or maybe I’m looking for female companionship and intimacy"
29 Apr 2024
My wife is 40 and wants a third child - but I can't go back there
"Many parents have mixed feelings as their parenting role evolves"
22 Apr 2024
My wife is pregnant – and being horrible to me
"I fear it’s the end of our loving, caring, communicative relationship"
15 Apr 2024
My partner and children are so messy that I no longer feel relaxed at home
"Experience your home from the eyes and needs of your children"
8 Apr 2024
I want to move abroad but feel I can’t leave my 35-year-old brother
"Sometimes, we’re in such a habit of shouldering responsibility we don’t know how to unburden ourselves"
1 Apr 2024
My wife and I haven’t had sex since our second child was born two years ago
"Fewer than half of men and women aged 16 to 44 in the UK have sex at least once a week"
23 Mar 2024
I don’t like the way my in-laws care for our kids – but we can’t cope without them
"Perhaps the bigger issue is that you feel as if your family is being taken over by them"
18 Mar 2024
I want to leave my bullying family business – but I’m trapped by the security
"I wonder how much of this burden – which I have no doubt feels incredibly weighty – might be in your head,"
11 Mar 2024
My ex is moving away with my 10-year-old – I regret our breakup
"I won’t get to see the best person in my life as much and I’m devastated."
4 Mar 2024
I drink every night and wake up on the sofa – I’m worried for my kids
"By facing what you’ve been suppressing, you can show compassion to yourself."
26 Feb 2024
My wife is always telling me off – I feel like I can’t do anything right
"No two individuals are expected to grow at the same pace and in the same direction."
19 Feb 2024
At 42, I have everything – but I’m unhappy
"I want to acknowledge the importance of anger in our lives."
12 Feb 2024
I love my wife but, at 32, am no longer attracted to her
"I’d recommend you reframe the idea that a successful relationship lasts for ever."
5 Feb 2024
I’m 50 and losing my hair and libido – I miss being young
"Our culture is particularly negative about ageing and conversely, glorifies youth"
29 Jan 2024
All I do in my mid-40s is work and parent – I’m lonely
"This is an opportunity for you to heal loneliness by connecting to yourself and others"
22 Jan 2024